Old Bones

Have you ever met yourself in a dream? What was your reaction? What did you say? Who were you? And where were you headed?

I was just having a conversation with a friend and he said he wished that he had more clarity as to what is really going on in the Universe/Dreams and this life. I said, I know me too. We start with ourselves first to gain a better understanding of the whole. The Universe’s answers lie within each of us, I believe.

“When we dream of meeting ourselves in a dream, we are beginning to connect with our true purpose and potential in waking life and starting to realize what makes us so unique…”

In real life, I had just ended up resigning from my job of ten years. I had reestablished relationships with people on a spiritual site who were encouraging me to find my dreams and pursue them. I had a profound dream early on in that journey that I will never forget.

I was in a darkened room, not unlike those in a rehab or hospital, and I had just woken up out of dream within a dream. The moon illuminated the room, casting a blue hue across everything in its path, including myself and the empty bed next to me. I was alone. For now. I looked outside and there were not one, but 7 moons shimmering down and casting shadows across the room.

Suddenly the light from the hallway poured in as the door to the room opened a crack. My roommate was finally here. Silent, she closed the door behind her as to not wake me, but I was already awoken from a dream.

She was thin. Thinner than I was at the time. She had short, dark brown hair, unlike my long blonde hair. Despite the cosmetic differences, I recognized her as myself. I knew within the dream that this was the first time meeting me as an adult, for I have had countless dreams of meeting myself face to face as a child.

She laid her suitcase on the floor and sat on the bed. A profound sadness filled the room as she wiped away her tears. I asked her what was the matter and she simply responded that she missed her mother. To which I replied, ‘You are here for you, not your mother. This is a break from reality. This is peace.’

Despite her melancholy, I was jealous of her overall appearance and I was jealous of the air she brought into the room. It was light and she was 100% herself. Or so I thought. I was lonely. I was depressed. I was stagnant and stifled. Maybe by myself. Maybe by my job. Maybe by this world. Maybe by not reaching my full potential as a human being and spiritual soul. You could feel her completeness although she could not.

Through her tears and while peering out into the moons, she asked, “What do you do for a living, for your life?”

“I am a graphic artist,” I replied.

“Is that all?” she prodded.

Not knowing how to answer, I replied with the same question. “What is it that you do?”

“I am historic. I dig up old bones for a living. I am a paleontologist of sorts.”

Tears welled up in my eyes as sheer pride overcame me. That was me. She had done it. She had become what I always wanted to be as a kid.

I was rushed back to my junior high days in my mind. It was Jurassic Park that had been the movie of the year. I was 15 I believe. That film had such a profound affect on my psyche that it is still, to this day, my favorite movie. The music, the graphics, the adventure, the thrill, the possibilities, the magic, the rebirth and the potential. Everything about it was ahead of its time. Everything about it, I wanted to be and embody.

As the family drove off into the moonlight the first out of 5 times I saw it in theaters, I looked up and dreamt of the day that I, too, could discover something so incredibly profound. Something inside myself was utterly shaken and I was in awe. In the moon that night, I saw the outline of the T-Rex that is on the logo for Jurassic Park. To this day, I cannot look at the moon without thinking about that moment. The moment I finally dreamt a dream.

It finally hit me and I knew then that she was not missing her mother, she was missing herself…the other half of her….which was me on the other side of the room, cast in moonlight. She couldn’t heal fully without coming back to rest and regain herself. To send a final message. Follow your dreams and you will find your better half. The opposite of you. The completion of you. The ying to your yang. Your higher self. Complete your destiny and encircle the ring of infinity. Look up to the moon and speak your truth, your goals and your future into existence.

She packed up her few belongings, which was a suitcase full of socks, and cried as she left, “I miss my mother”, and shut the door behind her, leaving me alone to now stare at one full moon.


(image courtesy of: http://walks-as-bear.com/once-in-a-blue-moon/)

3 Comments Add yours

    1. I dig with my bare hands. 😉

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