I’m Going to Take a Knife to ’em!

I may not have kids with legos strewn about and perfectly placed as obstacle courses and hazards from hell, but if I step on one more cord in my life, I’m going to take a knife to ’em all (the cords, folks…not kids). I need a wireless lifestyle. It really fucks with my vibe, ya know? One minute you’re floatin through the house, singin’ … the next you’re stumblin’ and cursin’ from the unholy depths of hell. Also, on that note – this couch has got to go. No support. I need one of those things most people have by now. What are they called? Husbands.

(The pillows, folks…not the man).


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